Life can be overwhelming sometimes. For the most part, being an adult is cool, but it kind of comes with a load of crap too, let’s face it.
I recently posted a smiling selfie with a caption saying that in spite of everything going on in my life, I’m overall quite happy. Ironically, I was bawling my eyes out within minutes of having posted it, even though everything I wrote was true… and it really got me thinking about what being happy actually means.
Most people who meet me, or even those who know me well, would typically describe me as a happy, bubbly, energetic (and annoying) person. I gladly agree with all of those, but I also struggle a lot with my mental health; specifically with anxiety, OCD, and depressive episodes – all of which can be quite severe at times.
Now I’m generally very open about these things, and there are many blog posts that I’ve yet to write in relation to this topic, but I still find that people are often very surprised when they find out that I’m not always the happy and carefree person that they think I am. Having said that, it doesn’t mean I’m not actually happy. Ya feel me?
This might not make sense in theory, but I don’t think that “happy” and “sad” are necessarily opposites… I think sometimes they can work together, and I’m not talking about putting up a facade. There were moments during the worst of my depression a few years back when I was still perfectly capable of feeling happy. Likewise, there are times when even though I’m generally content in life, I still feel very down. It’s not always the case where it’s either one or the other.
I’ve got a lot going on, and sometimes the slightest thing can tip me over the edge. There are days when I manage to handle everything calmly, but other days it gets the better of me.
Thankfully I’m not the kind of person who keeps things to myself and lets it all build up inside – pent up emotions always backfire in the long run. Whether I cry, sing, write, talk to someone, or kick a laundry basket hard enough to smash it (sorry mum), I always make it a point to somehow let it all out.
Again, in spite of all of that, I really do feel happy. I might have regular panic attacks and daily meltdowns… sometimes even three… and there are definitely times when I feel that I can’t carry on, but I also genuinely love living, laughing, smiling, and just feeling happy.
I guess the point I’m trying to make, if there really is one, is that the state of happiness doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t also feel down or overwhelmed. Shit happens – you deal with it and life goes on. But I think in general we should accept that people can feel different things and that it’s okay. If someone is sad, it’s great to remind them of the good things going on in their life, but maybe also validate their feelings if that’s what they need right at that moment.
I don’t know if this makes sense, or if anyone else feels this way too. Let me know your thoughts? I’d love to know what you think.
Until next time,